What is Narcissism?

Welcome to the inaugural edition of WHAT enlightenment?!! the parody e-bulletin dedicated to looking just that extra bit deeper into the big spiritual issues of the day or rather night ... after the guru has left the building and all his adoring devotees, and gone off to his Napoleonic slumberland of self-grandeur.

Wow kids! Shhhhh! Keep it on the down low, but now we can really explore enlightenment free from the humorless and autocratic editorial dictates of the simple, linear, self-reverent mind of our editor-in-chief (a.k.a. you know who!) In other words, hold onto your zafus, everybody, the little ol’ big daddy’s asleep (don’t we know it?) and we’re ready to rock. (Background audio: We Won’t Get Fooled Again by The Who)

We’re takin’ back the ship, so let’s have some fun!

We hope you enjoy it – and stay tuned for future messages like: “Collective Stupidity,” “The Glorious Mr. Wedgie,” and “Who said the Stockholm Syndrome is so bad?”

We’d love to get submissions from you too!


FEATURE ARTICLE:

WHAT IS NARCISSISM?

In a recent issue of his ?what is enlightenment magazine, publisher Andrew Cohen engages with integral philosopher Ken Wilber in dialogue.

“People are at different levels, some reach a higher level, discovering a trust in Life,” Cohen asserts. “Oh, yes,” Wilber follows, “but stages can’t be skipped, and some even slip back. They see paradise and then see it fade!”

WIE?…After Hours took note of this compelling dialogue between these two luminaries, and decided to pursue it further. It wasn’t easy, we had to send our cub reporter, Donald, all the way to France in order to catch up with these great spiritual pioneers.

?WIE…After Hours found Ken and Andrew at a seaside café table for two, overlooking the Riviera. Ken silently pointed to a chair, indicating where Donald was to sit, and the following dialogue was taped as the sun slowly set and as Ken and Andrew sipped the last of their glasses of champagne.

Ken: (glancing out at the sunset) Why, Andrew, you’re looking awfully fetching tonight. Is that the glow of Enlightenment I’m seeing? (He winks.)

Andrew: Oh Ken, you know I’m always in the same state – hot for you! (They titter.) But seriously, you know how frustrating it is with these wimpy devotees. People get a glimpse of the mountaintop, and think they own it. They don’t realize it belongs to me!

K: Don’t I know it! Why just this morning, I had a momentary lapse in my cosmic consciousness, and I’ll tell you, it was a total bummer. I mean, how do people live in just ordinary states?

A: Ken, you don’t know the half of it. Day in, day out, I have to bear the silly antics of students who have basked even briefly in the light that is Mine, and then when they slip back into the shadows of ignorance, they start whining. Why can’t they just shut up, and write me the goddamned check?By the way, have I ever told you that you’re the one who made shaven heads sexy?

K: Oh Andrew, how I wish I had your hair (ruffles Andrew’s head).

A: (Giggles.) Yes, but your gift of words! These canned dialogues are pretty tough on my vocabulary. Let’s just insert my usual rehash of your and Don Beck’s original ideas and have my editors do the rest, eh?

K: Deal! (They clink glasses.)

End.

We hope you have enjoyed our first issue of WHAT enlightenment?!! where big ideas are revealed and little minds are, well, swept away. We plan to further investigate the true nature and substance of Narcissism, as well as other important topics, so stayed tuned for future issues. Please write - click the comment button below.

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To the New Revolution!
Joyfully Yours,
The Editors
WHAT enlightenment?!!